Doug’s World

Ben-Vimdo a São Paulo!

… as it says on a banner over the highway coming out of the airport. I’m guessing that means “welcome to São Paulo,” but when you don’t know the language it’s hard to be sure about things. As became quite clear in my first few hours here …

I arrived Sunday morning, and the weather was hot, hazy and humid. On the cab ride from the airport to the hotel, I thought São Paulo looked a bit like Southern California. There’s gang graffiti all over the place, and lots of billboards using flesh to sell consumer products. Sometimes both at once.

I checked in to the Crowne Plaza hotel, where I have a view of some typical São Paulo architecture. I wanted to get on-line right away to see whether there was any email related to the preparations for tomorrow’s workshop, but connectivity is limited here. You can do wireless in the lobby, or use a funky little computer in the room for internet access, which costs about $15 per day. I paid for 24 hours, but it’s pretty lame because the virus software is out of date but it can’t download an update, so it tries 50 times and then shuts the computer down. But I’ve figured out that gives me about 5 minutes of internet access while it’s trying to update the virus definitions, so I can turn it on, check email, maybe send an email or two, then the computer shuts off. Better than nothing, but just barely.

I found no email about the setups, so I got a cab to take me to Microsoft at 1:00 this afternoon, to meet Marcio — the local network tech — as we had planned. We (Ted and I) are staying at the Crowne Plaza because the World Ophthmalmology Congress is in town this week and all the hotels close to Microsoft are full.

The cab driver was an elderly man who didn’t speak a word of English. He drove me through a tunnel, over a bridge, along the side of a canal, and then it started raining. He would only turn on his wipers once every minute or two, which was a little nerve-wracking when we could barely see through the water on the windshield. Eventually we arrived at our destination, or so he thought: he pulled up in front of the World Ophthmalmology Congress.

I knew it was the wrong place, because it was a 2-story building and I was to meet Marcio on the 31st floor. So I politely but firmly explained that this wasn’t my destination, and after he consulted with another driver we took off in a new direction, looking for Microsoft along Avenue Das Nacoes Unidas. After a mistaken turn that took 5 minutes to correct (going around a huge block in heavy traffic), we drove past a Hilton that I recognized (from a photo I had seen) as the one that’s next to Microsoft’s office in São Paulo.

I knew we were close, and I was getting tired of watching the meter climb while we drove around in circles, so I had him drop me there. I ask at the Hiton check-in counter which direction to Microsoft, and a couple minutes later I was at the reception desk of the Microsoft building.

The guy working the desk didn’t speak a word of English, of course. And to make matters worse, he smirked the whole time as if he was extremely amused by this silly American who couldn’t communicate with him. He placed a phone call, and after a long conversation in Portugese with somebody he made me a temporary single-access badge that I could use to get past the turnstiles and into the elevators.

Up on the 31st floor, there was nobody around and my temporary badge wouldn’t open the main doors, nor would my permanent Microsoft badge from back home. I got back in the elevator and checked out floors 32 and 30, but nobody was on those floors either. So I returned to 31 and started swiping my badge on every card reader I could find.

Apparently this showed up on a monitor somewhere, because a security guard arrived shortly. He was a muscular young man with tight slacks tucked into these really cool shiny black leather boots with little pockets in the sides of them. I want a pair of those boots!

Anyway, he was not amused by my predicament. I tried to explain that I was looking for Marcio, but — of course — he didn’t speak a word of English so that didn’t do any good. He sternly pointed at the elevator, I got in, and he escorted me back to the reception desk in the lobby.

Now Mr. Boots and Mr. Smirk started talking about me in Portugese, while I stood there waiting. They were like kids laughing at an animal in the zoo, freely staring at me while laughing and talking. This did not help my rapidly deteriorating mood.

I said “I’ll be back” and headed for the Hilton next door. I wanted to find a phone to call Marcio’s cell, and I was so annoyed at this point that I figured a short walk in the rain would cool me off a bit. That’s a nice thing about not having hair, rain is just a cooling process and has no other ramifications.

The staff at the Hilton desk did speak English, so they dialed the number I gave them and I found myself talking to Marcio. He seemed very nice, and he said he could meet me in the lobby of Microsoft’s building in 5 minutes.

I walked back and explained this to Mr. Smirk, then stood on the other side of the lobby waiting for Marcio. A minute later, a handsome young man in a suit and tie came walking out of the elevators toward me.

“Marcio?,” I asked, and he smiled. I shook his hand, and said “I’m sure glad to see you.” He replied “I am sorry, I don’t speak English.” He was being overly modest, I thought — we had communicated just fine on the phone.

Then he stepped behind the reception desk, where he picked up a phone and started dialing. I asked if he needed my badge, but he held up his hand, obviously annoyed with me, as if to say “calm down, you stressed-out type-A American jerk.” His demeanor seemed so different from our phone call a few minutes ago!

Then he handed me the phone, and I realized what was happening. This guy was some security schmuck (Mr. Smirk #2?), and he had Marcio on the phone. Or so I thought.

“Hey Marcio,” I began, but I was startled to hear a woman’s voice say “hello, I can’t hear you very well.”

“Who’s this? Who am I speaking to?” While I said this, Mr. Smirk #2 lived up to his name.

“This is Marcio’s wife,” she said. “I am helping you because he doesn’t speak English very well.” (Precise use of pronouns and indefinite articles is one of those things people tend not to do when speaking a second language, but I didn’t think about that at the time.)

So this is Marcio standing here with the shit-eating grin, I thought. And he’s not even going to talk to me, although he spoke English pretty well in our brief phone conversation. Asshole.

I explained to Marcio’s wife that I needed to get in to check the classrooms. She said “but he says you don’t have clearance and he can’t let you in, so you can’t do that today.”

I’d been fairly calm up until now, but I felt my self-control suddenly slipping away.

“Listen,” I said, glaring at Marcio, “I need to get into that classroom, and it will be a big problem for your husband if he doesn’t let me in. Big problem for his job. Big problem!” I knew that wasn’t really true, that I probably had no leverage at all, but I was just pissed at this point.

While I was yelling, another guy walked up to us. Dressed in jeans and a black t-shirt, he looked a lot more like a network tech than Mr. Smirk #2 did, and when he said “Doug!” and shook my hand vigorously while slapping my back, I realized I had finally found the real Marcio.

Marcio got me a badge from the Smirk twins, and we took the elevator up to the 31st floor. I told him about yelling at his wife and apologized for it, but he just laughed.

When we got to the classrooms, it was as if the sun had come back out. Everything was fine.

The VPCs were all installed, the presentations were on the C: drives, and the VPCs were actually running on most of the machines. Marcio and I chatted while he finished booting up the VPCs on the final workstations, I snapped a picture of the view from the lunchroom, and 15 minutes later we were done. I had expected to spend hours getting the setups done, but instead Marcio had already done everything and there was nothing for me to do.

My driver for the cab ride back to the hotel was a young guy who drove like a bat out of hell, and he took a much more direct route than the old man had, so the return to the Crowne Plaza took took a quarter of the time (and money) that it had taken to get there. I asked “do you speak English,” he said “no, sir” and I said “good, I think that’s best.”

I love it when a plan comes together.

One Year Ago Today …

I got up before 4:00AM to take a hike with my friend Scott. We started in the darkness, then the sun rose on a clear, cold morning as we approached the summit of Mount Kit Carson. From there we crossed the saddle and went on up to the top of Mount Spokane, where our workout was rewarded with a spectacular view in every direction.

A few hours later, I drove to Seattle (280 miles) to attend a Paul Westerberg show with my brother Brad and a few of his friends. It was a casual affair, so I didn’t change out of my my hiking clothes. Tanned and unshaven, I showed up with the mud of Eastern Washington still caked on my boots, wearing ski pants and a sweaty fleece pullover.

Brad had invited a co-worker named Megan, an editor I had heard about a time or two but had never met. When she arrived at the Green Door, I awkwardly extended my hand to introduce myself, spilling my wine all over the floor.

Now, one year later, Megan and I are living together in Seattle, working across the street from one another at Microsoft, and engaged to be married this spring. I’m writing this from DFW in Dallas, on the way to Brazil on business. Megan will meet up with me in a few days, and we’ll attend the opening ceremonies of Carnaval, South America’s biggest party, in São Paulo, the world’s 4th-largest city.

I’m a lucky man. Happy Anniversary, Megan! I can’t wait to spill more wine with you soon.

Spreading Freedom

I really should be packing for my flight, but I saw a story on CNN.com this morning that seemed unreal. It’s as if TheOnion has take over CNN: Donald Rumsfeld, the man who has been saying for years that his mission is “modernizing the military,” is now complaining about how Al Qaeda is so much better than the U.S. at the use of technology. I haven’t posted about anything political in a long time, but this is too good to pass up …

“Our enemies have skillfully adapted to fighting wars in today’s media age,” Rummy laments, “but … our country has not adapted.” Today’s weapons of war include e-mail, Blackberries, instant messaging, digital cameras and Web logs, he notes, but “we in the government have barely even begun to compete.”

The “dangerous deficiency,” as Rummy sees it, is that the Pentagon’s propaganda machine still operates eight hours a day, while Al Qaeda is fighting for the hearts and minds of the world’s citizens 24 hours a day.

In the interest of national security, I’d like to give Rummy a tip on how Al Qaeda is kicking the Pentagon’s butt in this arena. It’s called freedom. Freedom of the press, specifically.

When an Al Qaeda member dies in a high-tech U.S. air strike, for instance, journalists are free to run video of the battered body being carried home. But when an American soldier is killed by a crude Al Qaeda car bomb, American journalists are prohibited by law from showing the body or even the flag-draped casket on its journey home. (And that law is something brand-new that we’ve never had in any war before.)

On the battlefield, Al Qaeda lets journalists risk their lives to do whatever they want in their pursuit of the truth. That’s the way it’s always worked in past wars, but for this war we have laws that prevent our own journalists from freely moving around on the battlefield. We “embed” them in the places some military middle manager thinks they should be, rather than letting them run free with the troops as American journalists have done in every previous war.

So it seems obvious to me why we’re losing, Rummy. All we need is freedom, and then the world’s wealthiest high-tech fighting force will be able to compete on a level playing field with a few filthy sandal-wearing scumbags who live in caves. In the interest of national security, Rummy, let freedom ring!

First Hit vs. Most Hits

Robert Scoble has got a lot of people thinking about discrepancies between the search results returned by various search engines, as a result of his very successful bbbreeeport meme. But I think the conversation has been focused on the wrong aspect of those results: the total number of hits.

I doubt that most people ever look at that number. When you search for something, you’re trying to find a relevant piece of information, not a total. So you type something into a search engine, hit Enter, and then glance over the first few hits and pick one to investigate further. The “success” of your search is not in any way affected by whether there were 10 hits or 10 million, in most cases.

If that’s true, then the question of how hits are ranked is more important than the question of how many are found. So I tried a little experiment. I used a bunch of popular search engines to search for “Doug Mahugh” and made a note of what they showed as the very first hit in the results.

I’ve been sitting here waiting for a bunch of huge files to move across the network, so this seemed a nice mindless way to pass the time …

In some cases, the first hit is determined by a publicly known algorithm, so there’s nothing to test. For example, Technorati just puts them in reverse chronological order. So when I searched for myself there, the first hit was simply the most recent post that included my name, here. Technorati also had the fewest matches of any search engine I tried: 9 total.

Google Blog Search also had few hits — 14 total — but a different one showed up at the top of the list: my report on a Microsoft town hall meeting. I’m guessing that Google’s algorithm is probably based on a similar philosophy to their PageRank algorithm, which ranks the “importance” of a page by how many others link to it, and by the “importance” of those inbound linkers as well. Both Scoble and Mini-Microsoft linked to that post on the town hall meeting, and they both have thousands of in-bound links, so that makes sense.

MSN gave me the highest number of hits: 760 total. And the first match was my home page at www.mahugh.com, which has been around a long time. But in recent months I think there has been much less traffic on Mahugh.com than on my blog.

Google seems to know that. They gave me 370 hits, and put my blog home page first on the list.

Yahoo returned 593 hits, and the first one in the list was my page on the trip Mom and I took to Cambodia, Nepal and India in 1999. That page was visited by lots of people a long time ago, but probably hasn’t seen much action lately. Outdated statistics being used? Who knows. Altavista (my favorite search engine in the late 90s) returned the same link as #1 of their 590 hits.

By the way: I know that these totals aren’t accurate. But I’m going to let others worry about discrepancies between claimed totals and actual totals. My whole premise here is that totals don’t matter — I’m just looking at what comes first.

Lycos showed 214 hits, and they put one at the top of the list that I can’t begin to explain: a photo I took at a Todd Snider show in March of 2004. This appears very random to me — that page is one of dozens like it on my site, and I really doubt it has had much traffic or inbound links. Based on that one sample, I’d have a hard time trusting Lycos’s judgment on ranking search results.

I tried a few other long-in-the-tooth search engines, but the results became so erratic that I stopped. Dogpile, for instance, returned 25 hits and the first one was a dead link to a scanned copy of an article I wrote for Joystik Magazine in 1983.

So it looks like Google and MSN are the search engines to beat. I guess we already knew that.

Reducing the Ribbon

A lot of people, myself included, have a first reaction to the new ribbon-based user interface in Office 12 — er, I mean Office 2007 — that goes something like this: “the ribbon is really easy to use, and I love the way it displays the commands most relevant to my current activity, but I hate giving up that much of my screen!”

For those who aren’t familiar with the new UI, here’s a sample of the ribbon in Outlook 2007 while composing a message, and here’s a sample of the ribbon in Excel 2007. (If these screen shots don’t look sharp on your monitor, hover your mouse over them and then click the little 4-way arrow icon that appears in the lower right corner of the image, to expand it to its native size.)

Anyway, Jensen Harris has posted some information on his blog about how the ribbon is going to be streamlined in the next release of the beta, to the point that it will actually take up less screen space than the UI in Office 2003. This is great news! See also the comments on his post, some interesting info there as well.

Disabling Shutdown Event Tracker

Have you ever seen this prompt? If you’ve shut down a computer running Windows 2003 Server, you probably have. And it’s a pain in the ass when you’re rebooting computers a lot, as you do in all sorts of development scenarios. You reboot, do something else while it’s happening, then you look over and realize it’s sitting there waiting for you to explain why you’re rebooting. It’s annoying, time-wasting, and just plain intrusive: what other software on your computer ever says “I need to know why you’re doing this before I’ll do it.”

Yeah, I understand the intent, and the situations where this is useful. But I strongly disagree with it being ON by default. This is the sort of thing that should be OFF, and you can turn it ON if you need it. Sorry, but calling this a “security issue” (in which case it should be ON by default) is tantamount to letting the lawyers and bean-counters run the world, something I can’t accept even if it’s true.

Anyway …

I’ve recently had cause to disable the Shutdown Event Tracker (as this feature is called) on some machines, and I just wanted to pass on the steps in case anyone else wants to do the same:

- Go to Start/Run, type in GPEDIT.MSC and press Enter.
- Navigate to Computer Configuration > Administrative Templates > System in the left pane.
- In the right pane, double-click the “Display Shutdown Event Tracker” setting.
- Click Disabled, then click OK.

You’ll get one more prompt from the Shutdown Event Tracker, the next time you shut down, then after that it won’t appear any more. If you want to get rid of that prompt (so it won’t happen the next time this computer is shut down), go to a command prompt and type this command: gpupdate /force

What Does “Industrial-Strength” Mean?

One of the oldest tricks in sales is to acknowledge your competitor’s strength, then turn that into a liability. For example, “yes, the Hummer is certainly sturdier than the Honda, but think about how much gas it uses.”

This trick is often used by old, tired character-mode database vendors to compete with newer, flashier GUI platforms. For example, in my last job we developed a very easy-to-use high-performance line-of-business system based on Microsoft technologies like Visual FoxPro, SQL Server, and ASP.NET. But an IBM AS400 shop convinced management that they could offer an “industrial-strength” alternative, and they went that route.

Oracle has also often used that phrase to compete with Microsoft. Yes, Microsoft’s SQL Server is the world’s most widely used database and is tightly integrated with the world’s most popular operating system, but Oracle offers an “industrial strength” alternative.

Well, this morning Oracle.com was down for a while. Here are some screen shots.

To my knowledge, Microsoft.com hasn’t had a problem like that in a long time. For that matter, that Microsoft-based system at my old job was never down, either.

So what does “industrial strength” actually mean, guys?

Office Packaging, Pricing, Licensing Details

Well, it’s now official: the next version of Office, whose code name has been Office “12″ (gee, that sure kept people from guessing what we were talking about), will be called Office 2007. Other naming details that were made public late yesterday include the fact that Office Sharepoint Server is the name of the next version of what had been called Sharepoint Portal Server in the past, and Office Sharepoint Designer is the name for the new version of FrontPage that is designed for building pages that work with Sharepoint and Office, and it will sell for $299.

A few links for more information …

Here’s the Microsoft press release covering the announcement.

Here’s the official Office 2007 home page with links to all the details.

Here’s some information on Brian Jones’s blog.

Here’s a News.com story about the announcement.

17 Minutes with BillG

Microsoft’s Channel 9 interviewed Bill Gates on Monday. He’s relaxed and talkative, and more open than you’ve probably ever seen him.

For example, when asked what web sites he visits, he laughs and says “I love the privacy of the internet, and I’m not going to tell you everything,” then mentions some non-Microsoft sites.

When asked about Office 12, he discussed the new UI, Sharepoint, and the new extensibility model for third-party developers. Nice job, Bill, that’s completely consistent with the Office 12 message we’ve been delivering from Building 18. The kid knows his stuff, you gotta give him that even if his haircut still looks like he got it from a fellow teenager.

You think an Apple employee could write something like that about Steve Jobs and sleep as soundly as I will tonight?

Google: the next Nextscape?

I recently blogged about not wanting Microsoft to be the next Google. Now I see that some other people have been talking about how Google could be the next Netscape.

I especially liked this quote:

Google, perceived (although that is changing) as the more friendly company, doen not reach out to the community in the same ways Microsoft is now. Google is not asking Dave Winer to brainstorm on their RSS strategy. Google is not flying, well, anyone down to the Googleplex to get some outside world perspective on their product development (and trust me, the community has a lot of things to say to Google).

This is consistent with what I’ve been hearing from the developers we work with on Office “12″ evangelism. Just last week, one of them told me “I still disagree with a lot of what Microsoft is doing, but I have the sense that you guys are listening to me.” Another recently said “Microsoft’s biggest strength right now isn’t your products, it’s your openness and transparency.” And yesterday a founder of a software company stood in my office and explained to me and my manager what he’d like to see different in our upcoming offerings while we took notes and acknowledged that he had some great points.

Bring it on, we’re listening.